The Country Mom’s How To Guide For Election Day Voting

Step 1. Load up kids and drive 20 minutes into town.

Step 2. Unload the double stroller, load up the kids and enter building to vote.

Step 3. Slap yourself in the forehead as you realize out of city limit residents can only vote in town pre election day.

Step 4. load kids back in the car along with the double stroller. Consider this your workout for the day.

Step 5. Type the address you were given for the place you need to vote at into the GPS.

Step 6. The voting place doesn’t have a restroom so stop at a grocery store for your child to potty. THIS STEP IS NOT OPTIONAL.

Step 7. Follow your GPS to a cow field. Your GPS says you are at your destination. You realize you are too far from civilization for the GPS to be working.

Step 8. Drive in the general direction you think you’re supposed to be going. Pass a lot of cow fields.

Step 9. Try the GPS again and find the GPS still can not locate your location. Try your cell phone to check for a map- laugh. Of course there is no internet connection stupid.

Step 10. Spot a couple of good old boys sporting overalls and stop and ask for directions.

Step 11. The good old boys will point to the total opposite direction than you have been driving.

Step 12. Consider giving up. No don’t- think thoughts about the founding father’s and all that.

Step 13. Arrive at small town city hall you think you’re supposed to vote at.

Step 14. Be informed it’s actually the OLD small town city hall you’re looking for.

Step 15. Arrive at OLD small town city hall. Park your mini van among the pickup trucks.

Step 16. Keep child out of the mud.

Step 17. You made it! Ask for a paper ballot because you’re hip and conspiracy-minded-ish.

Step 18. Try to think deeply about marijuana over the sound of, “MAMA! WHAT ARE YOU DOOOOOING?”

Step 19. Quietly reiterate the voting process to a 3 year old.

Step. 20. Put your ballot in the voting machine and watch to make sure it actually gets counted because you’re conspiracy-minded-ish.

Step 21. OPTIONAL. Take a selfie with your “I voted today sticker.” It’s what all the cool kids do.


This post may or may not have been written based off of experience for your entertainment..


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